Blog, Tips and Dating Support for Singles in Switzerland
3 Reasons You’re Not Already With the Partner of Your Dreams
What you’ll learn:
- Finding love in the post-pandemic world requires flexibility.
- Don’t listen to well-meaning friends who give you advice about dating.
- Even if you hate the idea, online dating is worth the risk because it’s the most effective way to find the partner of your dreams.
- With the support of a dating coach, you can fulfill your dreams of finding love faster.
Are you frustrated with the dates you've been on recently or avoiding dating altogether? Are you tired of coming home to an empty house and sitting down for dinner for one, night after night?
Are you ready to finally feel a sense of fulfillment and stop thinking that you still have that one missing piece in your personal life? Learn why you’re not with a partner of your dreams and how to change that.
Matchmaker Won’t Do The Trick
“I’m just not meeting (the right) men, I just need an agency or matchmaker to set me up on dates.” That’s the most common request I hear from singles who come to me for help in finding the right partner.
Here’s the truth (based on my almost 17 years in the dating industry):
You don't need an agency or matchmaker to set you up on dates.
What you need is a more holistic approach that considers your specific needs and situation.
In today’s ever-changing dating world, it is more important than ever to be equipped with a plan as you begin to date. Today’s obstacles are different from the past and are also constantly changing.
In the past years facemasks and restricted social interactions have seriously limited the way we have been able to meet others. Finding the partner of your dreams isn’t something that is just going to happen for you, no matter how much you’d like to believe it... especially now.
My best advice is to focus on what you can do.
Online dating and dating apps have become the new normal and even though the world is slowly recovering from the pandemic , using modern-day technology to meet other singles is here to stay.
The pandemic years have changed the world of dating
Why You’re Not Meeting The Partner of Your Dreams
Here are the three main reasons you’re not having success as you look for a partner:
1. You refuse to date online.
So many women avoid using dating apps because they think love should happen ‘naturally’ or because they don’t want to have to explain to their friends and family that they met their partner on Tinder.
Love isn’t just going to happen, and it is important to recognize the world around us. Forget about the stigmas that you have in your head about dating apps. T hink about the advantages that this new world of dating can offer you. You should use virtual dating to filter your options.
Now you can meet people and get a feel for whether they might be a good fit without leaving your living room. You can now go on a virtual date without meeting up with someone in person and filter out those who don’t match their dating profiles or aren’t a good match without having to waste your precious time. In-person dates are reserved for people who have passed your first screening.
Read here about how to start using virtual dating as a first step to finding a partner.
2. Limiting beliefs are holding you back.
Our mind is incredibly powerful and always believes what we tell it. Some limiting beliefs can be personal like:
- “I’m not strong/thin/tall/funny/pretty/enough.”
- “I’m too old/independent/have too much baggage, etc.”
- “I only attract commitment-phobes/unavailable men.”
- “There aren’t any men available where I live.”
Some limiting beliefs can be gender-based like:
- “Men are intimidated by successful women.”
- “Men only want sex.”
- Men don’t want to commit.”
- There aren’t any quality men.”
When we believe something, our mind searches for evidence that what we believe is true. This is called confirmation bias.
When we focus on negative things, that is what grows in our life, but alternatively, if we choose to focus on positive things like gratitude, beauty, appreciation, and love then that is what will flourish.
Don’t let limiting beliefs hold you back from finding love
3. You don’t have the strategy and support
Love, like anything else, needs the right support. We frequently get unhelpful advice from well-meaning friends and family.
Sometimes y our support network can do more harm than good as you look for the partner of your dreams . I’ve heard all sorts of friendly advice, for example rules you are or aren’t allowed to say on a first date, rules about when it’s appropriate to sleep with a new partner and even rules about what you should lie to your partner about.
It is amazing that people love us so much and try to help but bad advice can do a lot of damage, especially in the beginning of a relationship.
Finding and choosing the right partner is a process. I like to compare it to finding a new job. While some people may have incredible luck and on their first interview land their dream job, the reality is usually quite different for most of us.
In fact, often you may apply for a position and never hear back, or it can take a long time. Sometimes a scheduled interview may get canceled because the company found another candidate internally.
S ometimes after several rounds of interviews, they end up choosing someone else. You may even have an unsuccessful interview but later, for whatever reason, get offered the job anyway.
We can all relate to this idea in some way or another and the important takeaway here is that we do our best to not get discouraged in the process and never give up.
Giving up prematurely will only bring you back to where you started, alone.
Get Strategic About Dating
Dating is a filtering process, finding love is a process –I can’t do it for you, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone!
My proven program, Find Your Success Match, is based on the three pillars of
BEING the right partner
FINDING the right partner
CHOOSING the right partner
If you are ready to benefit from having true support and accountability, book a free consultation here to see if it might be a good fit and if it’s not, I’ll let you know that too, no strings attached.